April Blog

This month we will address:


  • Three more attributes of character.
  • Quotes
  • Chesapeake News


Relationships are the key to culture part 2:


Last month we began our discussion on how “relationships kill racism” and how relationships are a function of your leadership and thus your personal character.  We discussed in detail how you view other people, the level of joy you bring to the table and whether you can be forgiving of people’s mistakes.  This blog is posted on our website, www.chesapeakeconsultinginc.com.  Here are the next three of the nine items that make up your character.   They are all choices. 


I choose to be patient with people who look, sound, or interact in a way that is different from what I’m used to.  When we find ourselves in a different environment or different culture from what we are accustomed to it may be more difficult to understand what is going on.  If in addition to that, we tend to be a bit impatient, then that can lead to poor behavior on our part which may disrespect someone.  “Hurry up and get to the point,” you might be thinking. 


Patience is certainly not my strong suit – however that is not an acceptable excuse for those times I fail to exercise patience.  Sometimes slowing down and being in the moment and focusing on the person that “interrupted” you is a good practice.  I try and work on this with my dog.  Each morning, during either my meditation time or while I am reading the morning newspaper, Willow will bring me a toy or stick her cold nose up on the table to nudge me.  It is an interruption.  I am trying to discipline myself to be interrupted.  I stop what I am doing and focus on her – hoping that behavior will translate to when a human does the same thing.


I choose to practice kindness to people of other races.  Many acts of kindness are impulsive while others are premediated.  Perhaps some premeditation can help you in those time where you need to be impulsive and act in the moment.  Last week the office dubbed me to go pick up Chinese take-out lunch.  After I picked up our order and was fixing to head back to the office someone rapped on my driver’s side window.  It was someone looking for a handout.  He caught me off guard and I dismissed him with some sort of a terse comment.  I regret that.  However, what it has inspired me to do is to make up some kits ahead of time so the next time this happens (and it will happen again, I just don’t know when) I will be prepared with a package that was prepacked especially for this purpose.   Are we able to be kind to people that are different than us?  How about people who disagree with us politically?  How about people that are unkind themselves?  We need to be kind regardless. 



I choose goodness towards people of other races.  Do you intentionally look for ways to highlight the achievements of co-workers that are different than you?  Not in a patronizing or insincere way but in a genuine manner.  Do you practice humility and put the achievements of others above your own?  Goodness also involves being honest regarding money and truth telling.  Are you tempted to take advantage of others based up some status that you may have gained?  Or, do you use your status to lift up others? 






  1. Do not take the agenda that someone else has mapped out for your life.  John Maxwell
  2. Be decisive.  Right or wrong; make a decision.  The road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.
  3. A man can accept what Christ had done without knowing how it works; indeed, he certainly won’t know how it works until he has accepted it.  C.S. Lewis
  4. If you don’t change the direction you are going, then you are likely to end up where you are headed.  John Maxwell
  5. Empathy means seeing the issue from the other person’s perspective.  Empathy cuts down the resistance between two hurt people.  Dr. Gary Rosberg.
  6. Reverence is the spiritual relationship between a man to God and a dog to a man.  Ambrose Bierce
  7. There are no good people.  There are just bad people who get justice or bad people who get grace.  Mark Driscoll
  8. Stay focused instead of getting offended or off track by others.  John Maxwell.
  9. Spiritual renewal and transformation are not accomplished instantly; they take strength and perseverance.  They take a lifetime.  But God supplies the strength.
  10. Without some sort of liturgy, civil life can be pretty barren, a wasteland, and the fire of His sprit soon goes out.”  Father Lawrence, the Monks of New Skete.
  11. Relational skills are the most important abilities in leadership.  John Maxwell
  12. When we substitute identity politics for a unified human purpose and love for all humanity, we put a smile on the devil’s face. 
  13. A soft answer turns away wrath.
  14. But trying to build a spiritual life without liturgy is like drilling for oil with a shovel.  The Monks of New Skete
  15. We feel unhappy and confused with our life when we don’t focus on the calling that God has for our life.  John Maxwell
  16. The mystical body of Christ is the tangible symbol and arena of God’s presence in our midst.  By virtue of our membership in Christ we are intimately related to each other.  The Monks of New Skete
  17. Spiritual people are not those who engage in certain spiritual practices; they are those who draw their life from a conversational relationship with God.  Dallas Willard



Chesapeake Consulting News: 


We are focusing our job profiling, leadership development and behavioral assessments including Emotional Intelligence on Sheriff’s Departments.  Supporting those men and women that give so unselfishly to serve us is an honor and a privilege.  


Sheriff’s departments are different than police departments in that in addition to law enforcement they are normally the ones that run the county jails and provide security and transportation to and from court.  The key resource is that individual deputy out there in the community, in the jail or in the courtroom handling both the routine and the unannounced threat to public safety that they address on our behalf.  They are certainly worthy of our respect and best efforts to add value to them in a manner that makes them more effective in the job that they do on our behalf. 


I have completed co-facilitating a study group using my new book “Don’t Do Anything Stupid – A White Man’s Guide to Racial Harmony.”  I discuss some of what we learned on a You Tube video discussing the book and the issue of racism.  I would love for you to view the video and purchase the book.


John Covington


Purchase books at Amazon.com, or visit THIS LINK